Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
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