he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
