You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
