i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
