this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Randomize
