HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
