I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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