garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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