But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Randomize
