is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
