Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
