And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
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