Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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