i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
