thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
