yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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