We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
