he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
