I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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