i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize