Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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