I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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