Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
