try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
