You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize