Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
This girl is more easily done than said...
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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