Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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