Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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