singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
