He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Randomize
