its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
