my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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