Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
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