my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
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