Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
