i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
