So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
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