Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
