Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
