I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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