Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
