I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Randomize
