Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
