Where is the hickey?
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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