she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
