Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
