i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
