Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Even my vagina gasped.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
