i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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