fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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