Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
two words: eviction party
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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