hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize