Why are handjobs necessary in class?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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